Earlier this season there was an abundance of catchy slogans coming out of MFC. It was 'Your Town, Your Club, Your Boro' style nonsense which seemed optimistic at the time but is now downright depressing.
However, they are right as love them or loathe them (and I think we know which camp most of us are in at the moment), Boro are a massive part of the identity of Middlesbrough.
"We're just a small town in Europe" and "Smoggies on Tour" are just some of the ways we indentify ourselves as Boro fans born and bred.
And then there is the'Boro Pride' initiative. This particular piece of branding is looking rather ironic in light of recent results.
There has been less and less pride on display from our Boro boys and the only passion witnessed recently was the vehemence with which a mob of our players argued against Digard's dismissal on Saturday.
Last weekend was an awful awakening. It was the first time we really acknowledged that maybe there aren't three teams worse than Boro in the Premier League.
But Saturday was also my Dad's sixtieth birthday party so there was little time to dwell on the mire Middlesbrough Football Club has now got itself into when there was 'Dad dancing' to indulge in, wine to be drunk and parmos to be eaten!
Oh yes, my sister had brought her 'Chester family' with her and they were determined to devour Middlesbrough's finest and possibly only unique delicacy.
The humble parmo, like MFC, is another Teesside institution and one that our miscellaneous band of tourists heartily approved of.
I could stretch out this metaphor for a while. After all, a parmo is unhealthy, quintessentially Boro and best 'enjoyed' through a numbing haze of alcohol. This pretty much describes our team, at least at the moment.
But Boro really do have a monumental effect on the mood of the town.
When the Boro lose, depression pervades the whole town. Likewise a successful cup run, or even a rare and precious win over one of the 'Big Four', often puts a smile on the sourest of faces.
As it is, we are the poor relations up north, only nobody feels sorry for us.
One of my sister's friends happens to be from Wolverhampton and informed me rather gleefully "I just find it funny that by the looks of it, we will be changing places!"
I don't find it funny at all but I think she is probably right.
Linking back to my last column, another of our party, a certain Welsh West Ham fan who shall remain nameless, took to belting out "Digard got sent-offfffffff" whenever Kings of Leon was played and when he was deservedly wacked in the chest by myself and my sister, he changed his tune to "You're going dowwwwwwwwnnnn!"
Incidentally the 'characters' in this column may seem hard to believe but then so is an international defender turned fledgling manager who cannot train a team to defend set pieces!
Then there is the "it's only a game" brigade. But it isn't. In the middle of the Credit Crunch with freezing temperatures outside and jobs disappearing faster than Kevin Keegan when he didn't get his own way at Newcastle, Middlesbrough, like most of the country, is in a bit of a sorry state.
In Middlesbrough, one element of pride is that we still have a Premier League football team. We are a community club and one of the best for schemes which use the name of the club to benefit and promote the town.
However, a significant amount of funding comes from Premier League organisations.
One way or another, if MFC slip into the Championship, it will hit the town hard.
Right now I approach Boro matches with a resigned dread. After a summer which never really got into its stride and lots of pre-season coverage over the future of Cristiano Ronaldo which was only interesting if you happen to be, well, Ronaldo, I was really looking forward to our 2008-09 campaign.
This season was going to be different. We had an exciting club record signing, players with exotic names and expensive pedigrees and local boys coming through the ranks, bursting with pride and passion for their home town club.
Yet what we are now left with is a 'goal machine' who cannot finish and an odds and sods collection of wantaways, can't play through injuries and simply don't cares.
However, there are bright spots. Middlesbrough has historical figures such as Captain James Cook and shiny new beacons of light for a better future such as mima.
MFC have legends like Brian Clough and sparky young midfielders Didier Digard and Josh Walker.
Middlesbrough as a town is concentrating on regeneration. Middlesbrough Football Club need to do the same.
Managers and players change face more often than Doctor Who at most clubs but MFC simply don't have the budget for a new cast. However, we can bring in a couple of extras as guest stars always perk up viewing figures.
Monday has come and gone and Southgate is still manager. Whether you agree with the decision or not, it is the reality at present so we may as well get on with it.
I realise that that statement is not the most positive one to make but I'm all ra-ra'd out right now.
I will, however, still utter the rallying call. Get someone in to help our crumbling manager and our crippled team!
A new boss, new players, new coaches, hell bring back the cheerleaders if you think it'll help! After all, we are lacking leaders.
The town and the team need something to get excited about and in the absence of another intrepid explorer emerging or even more obtuse foodstuffs being invented. It is MFC who we look to to drag us kicking (hopefully balls into nets) and screaming (in celebration) out of our gloom and doom.
And if all else fails, we will always have parmos!
First published on www.ComeOnBoro.com on 20/1/2009
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